Brighter Than The Sun

There is nothing that causes my heart to flip flop more than the thought or sight of my beautiful daughter (no...not even the perfect pair of Christian Louboutin's). When I think about what I've done in this world, what I've contributed, what kind of person I am, what I've accomplished either personally or professionally, where I have traveled, whose lives I have in some way touched, and what awaits me at the end of my journey I always come to the same conclusion. Everything, EVERYTHING - good or bad - is worth it because of her.

If they told me that I was guaranteed a long, healthy, cancer-free life but that I would have to give up ever having Taryn, I would decline. I have a lot of loving individuals in my life - family, friends, neighbors - but none so light up my world as Taryn does. As we celebrated her 21st birthday this weekend, I was reminded over and over again how brightly her star burns in my world.

That joyful face you see above? That is what I live to see, and on occasion it tortures me to think that my illness and its inevitable outcome cloud that joy. Fortunately, we were able to put all of that aside while we celebrated her passage into adult womanhood (or, more correctly, her passage into the various bars and pubs of College Park!). Chris, Bruce and I sprang for an open-bar party for her and her friends at a local watering hole (call it Galaganza II if you will) Saturday night and watched happily as she was toasted and feted and cheered by her friends. She was thrilled to have out-of-town family there (Lisa, Warren, John, Jeanne, Ian, Patti and Patty) - well, as long as we stayed in our corner of the bar (just kidding - she was proud to introduce us to her friends and vice versa). She was absolutely luminous in a sequined dress and sparkly tiara and sky-high heels. She was full of brilliant smiles, infectious giggles, funny jokes, and impish camera poses. She blushed when, at the end of the night, her friends broke out into a spontaneous and loud rendition of "Happy Birthday" and she fiercely hugged all of us and declared her love and appreciation as the night wound down for the "grown-ups" (truth be told, we had probably had enough shots by then anyhow - we now know why them call them "Woo-Woos").

As for me...I am profoundly grateful that I got to enjoy another of my daughter's birthdays. I am refreshed after a weekend of her sunlit smiles. And I am proud and privileged to be Taryn's mother - for in my life, she truly blazes brighter than the sun. As Jeannie would say - "That's lucky!"

Blessings and Love to All.